My child: Let us Show Understanding for the Worries of Our Teenagers
Every child experiment withs curses and ugly words. Profanity is often heard on the streets, on television, in our environment. It is a part of language and folklore of every nation, and has its rightful place but the children do not know when it is appropriate to curse and therefore we must try to make children understand that curses are not nice words.
Be ready to have the biggest problem with your surroundings (family, friends ...), who will find it funny and interesting when the children say bad words, and maybe they will encourage or even teach them new bad words. On the other hand, it is very interesting for children to be in the focus of attention while swearing.
In these situations, I did not react, I ignored the swearing. My children would notice, every time, that I didn’t find it interesting. When I was alone with my children, I tried to explain them, that these words are inappropriate and insulting. I would explain why everyone laughed as well. I said that they were laughing because profanity is not nice, it is not interesting.
At one period, in elementary school, my son started to curse very often and in a very ugly manner. No explanations helped. Banning was not my education style, so I decided to ask him to curse even more. For every curse he would say, I would ask him to go to the bathroom, shut the door and repeat the word 10 times, but loud enough so I can hear him in the living room.
He may be "shocked" by himself, or he realized the absurdity of words he repeated, but he stopped swearing, soon.
My daughter began to curse a little later, when she was 11 or 12. I told to her. She was reading a lot, even some books for grown-ups, and had a sense for words. She found profanity in the books, where they had their place and contributed to the vivid description of the situation. I could not deny the importance of curses in the language, but together, we concluded that the expletive sounds more aggressive than other words, and if it is not used in the right place, it sounds very ugly.
I remember the example I gave her:
-When you are going down the street, talking to someone and then curse, even in the right place, a passer would only hear the cursing. Certainly, he would turn around and wonder that such a nice girl uses such ugly words.
Today, as adults, both of them are liberal about profanity, but they respect the rules of good conduct. Every word has its place, time and group when it can be said and when it makes sense.
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